curiouswombat: (Granny)
[personal profile] curiouswombat
It's Mothering Sunday here in the UK. It is the fourth Sunday in Lent - the Sunday when people traditionally returned to their mother church - and so usually to the one that the rest of their family worshipped at, or were also returning to for the day - in this way it became a day of family re-union, a day for young people who had left home to work to see their own mothers as well as their mother church. Celebrated now in much the same way as the more recently introduced Mothers' Day in the US and much of the rest of the world.

Last year I was bemoaning the fact that it had never occurred to my husband to arrange for us to go out to lunch like so many other families. He obviously didn't think I was serious about being upset about this, because I didn't get to go out this year either, he has probably forgotten. There is no point in sitting and getting upset over it - he cannot see what it has to do with him, and no amount of pointing out on my behalf has been any use over the last seventeen years. Next year will be too late - as our daughter will not be here to celebrate it with me.

However, we had a no cook lunch - everyone made their own sandwiches, and D-d and I sat on the settee and ate M&S curries for tea, so no major effort was required! D-d bought me flowers, and chocolate ginger (which I love!), and made me what she describes as a completely OTT card, with flowers and 3D butterflies.

We had a nice Mothering Sunday service at Church - and at the end of it we got almost the entire congregation together and took a group photograph. This is for our Church web-site, which I am involved with putting together - I'll link to it when we finally get up and running!

Anyway - just in case S2C had thought about us going out for lunch, and was keeping it as a surprise for me(!), D-d and I took my Mum out for lunch yesterday, and so, as it is Mothers' Day, I thought I would show you another of my family photos - this time, of my Mother.



My mother was quite a beauty in her day -



This photo was taken when she was about twenty two or three, by my Dad, I think.

My Mum was born in January 1927, and spent long periods of her childhood in hospital, with quite severe inner-ear infections - no antibiotics then. She has had ear-drum damage ever since, but her right ear worked pretty well, so the hearing loss on the other side was not obvious to anyone. The long months in hospital mean that her formal schooling was patchy, and so she failed her exams to go to the Grammar school, and stayed at 'The Board School' until she left the Christmas before her 14th birthday. (The Board School was the school set up by the Board of Education to cover the compulsary schooling of all five to fourteen year olds.)

At fourteen she was a 'mothers help' looking after three small children - and we hear people now comment that 'children grow up too fast these days'!!

By sixteen she was working as a counter assistant in a local grocers shop, alongside a slightly older young woman, who was to be her constant companion in mischief until they both married, and even now her and Marjory stay in touch. This was of course in 1943 - rationing at its height, a brother away in the war, and many of her own generation of young men also leaving the island to join up. However, Mum and Marjory were not short of social activities, because there were a lot of airmen stationed on the island during the war! From the age of 16, when she was deemed old enough to go to dances, Mum was never short of dance partners. (There was still a UK air-force base on the island after the war - until 1962.)

She was talking about the social whirl of her youth a few months ago - and had D-d and I in stitches laughing. She would finish work about 6pm, and both her and Marjory would dash home, change out of their work clothes, have a quick wash (no bathroom in either house), put on their glad-rags and dash out again. There were dances held in Ramsey, where they lived, or sometimes there would be transport to Jurby or Andreas, the nearest RAF bases. On one occasion on a night out at Jurby, the bus waited for Marjory and her beau, and when they arrived, as Marjory got on board, the airman said 'You nearly forgot these', and handed her what turned out to be her cami-knickers! Mum said one shoulder strap had broken when she was dancing, then the other broke later under the strain of doing all the work alone - so the entire garment had dropped, and it had been easier for Marj to take them off to aid her flight for the bus. My mother believed her - so why should we doubt it?

Actually she was commenting on how innocent it had all been - and when you realise that she was younger then than my daughter is now - I think, at least for her, it probably was.

Once the black-out ended they extended their social life to Douglas - and the dash to get washed and changed became even more hectic as the coach to Douglas left about 6.30, to get them there by about 7.30. She said you ran out, still fastening things, clutching a sandwich, and hoping you hadn't forgotten anything important. She did on at least one occasion though. She said one spring evening, as she walked from the coach to the nearest dance hall, she thought 'funny - it's a bit chilly,' and realised that she had forgotten her knickers! She had taken her work ones off, and forgotten her clean ones - she says she was very careful to keep her hand on her skirt all evening, and not do any dances that might make it fly upwards!

Mind you, on another occasion she did a 'Marjory' herself - knickers in those days, at least smart ones, were silk (often parachute silk) with a buttoned waistband, and her button came off, and the knickers dropped down to her ankles. She says she just scooped them up, put them in her handbag, and walked carefully for the rest of the evening! Thank goodness for M&S knickers, say I! Far fewer underwear disasters these days!

In later years my Mum was a cook - and when we were visiting her yesterday, although D-d and I took cake, Mum had made scones - and even at 79 she is still game to try something new - they had preserved ginger in them, rather than dried fruit - and I must try it myself, because they were very, very nice!

Date: 26/03/2006 08:50 pm (UTC)
gillo: (by kazzy_cee)
From: [personal profile] gillo
Lovely stories. My Mum's about eighteen months older, and also worked for a grocer's shop during the war. She too has tales to tell of airmen - they even had some billeted in the house. The war years were grim, of course, but it's clear young people found lots of ways to have fun - even, perhaps, a little extra freedom.

Date: 26/03/2006 09:06 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] curiouswombat.livejournal.com
There were airmen billeted at my Gran's as well - and then post-war there were convalescing soldiers sent over for the sea air - that included my Dad at one stage!

Date: 26/03/2006 10:52 pm (UTC)
gillo: (getting better)
From: [personal profile] gillo
Aha. Mum met my Dad through a blind date, though oddly there were several other ways they could have met. (They lived more or less round the corner from each other all through the war.)

Billeted soldiers must have been a hassle for the parents, but were obviously a great opportunity for the teenagers!

Date: 26/03/2006 08:57 pm (UTC)
jerusha: (Default)
From: [personal profile] jerusha
What a lovely story! Although, I'm sorry you didn't get to go out to lunch. I'll need to remember to remind my dad and brother to treat Mom nicely when Mother's Day comes around here. And your Mum was quite a beauty.

Date: 26/03/2006 09:07 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] curiouswombat.livejournal.com
Thank you - she was very smart, wasn't she?

I'm assuming she has all her underwear on in the picture!

Date: 26/03/2006 09:06 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] spikesdeb.livejournal.com
What a great story! I love these snippets. Sorry your mothers's day wasn't exactly what you hoped but I suppose you had fun nonetheless.

And now here's me begging shamelessly - my grandma used to make the most delicious scones - hardly measuring anything, using her eye to make sure the fat to flour ratio was right - and I adored them. I am not a bad cook - but scones elude me. I kick myself that all those times I helped her (read pulled on her apron and ate half the sultanas/currants)- I didn't ask her to pass on her secret. To cut a long story short, if you could share any baking tips for yummy scones that rise (mine don't even though they don't taste bad!) I would be eternally grateful. :)

Date: 26/03/2006 09:17 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] curiouswombat.livejournal.com
My scones usually rise pretty well - roportions of sugar and fat aren't really all that important - I use about 2oz of each to about 8 oz of flour - but if you are using self-raising add an extra level teaspoonful of baking powder. The secret to them rising really well though is to use half plain and half bread flour, and a couple of well rounded teaspoons of baking powder to each 8 oz flour - the gluten in the bread flour helps then to hold the air in as they rise. Also don't be tempted to roll the dough too thin just to get a few more out of it - leave it a good half to three quarters of an inch deep - I used to be guilty of this!

Date: 26/03/2006 09:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] spikesdeb.livejournal.com
Thank you! That's really helpful. I'll give it a try and let you know how it turns out - although, I love scones that much that you'll probably hear me over in the IoM from here in Merseyside! Thanks again, much appreciated.

Date: 26/03/2006 10:53 pm (UTC)
gillo: (eny fule)
From: [personal profile] gillo
I sometimes add an egg to my scones - against the rules a bit but they rise beautifully.

Date: 26/03/2006 11:10 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] curiouswombat.livejournal.com
It would work in the same way as the bread flour - the bread flour works because of the higher protein content - and the egg would do it too. I'd forgotten until you mentioned it, but I think my Aunty Janey used to add an egg - she said they kept better.

Date: 27/03/2006 07:03 pm (UTC)
gillo: (Default)
From: [personal profile] gillo
I tend to freeze those not for immediate consumption, but it's true that they are much nicer the next day if there's egg in the mix.

Date: 26/03/2006 09:20 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] caliente-uk.livejournal.com
Thanks for sharing your Mum's story with us. I love these little snippets you give us into your family history. You're a born story teller! :)

Happy Mother's Day!

Date: 26/03/2006 09:25 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] curiouswombat.livejournal.com
Thank you - hope you had a lovely day yourself. I like doing the family history snipets - I am slowly getting them printed out into a scrapbook to pass on.

Date: 26/03/2006 09:35 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hesadevil.livejournal.com
It's so lovely to see today referenced correctly as Mothering Sunday when people returned to the mother church. Thank you for sharing more of your family history with us.

My daughter sends flowers every year and always phones. She left home 15 years ago and always remembers this special day no matter where she is or what she's doing.

Happy Mother's Day.

Date: 26/03/2006 10:26 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] curiouswombat.livejournal.com
It's lovely when they remember - I kind of hope mine will when she leaves.

Although I'll still get my chocolate from church - one of the ladies pointed out a few years ago how sad she felt when the Mums whose children were there got sweets, (even if those children are grown up) and those whose children were on the other side of the world, like hers, didn't. She gives us some extra 'chocolate money' to add to that which the Sunday School usually spend, and all the Mums get sweets - even those who are 'honorary mothers and grandmothers' within the church family although they've never actually given birth.

Date: 26/03/2006 10:07 pm (UTC)
kathyh: I made this (Kathyh English)
From: [personal profile] kathyh
What lovely stories. My mum's just over a year younger than yours so to her great regret missed out on all the exciting social opportunities of the war. Funnily enough we were round at my parents this evening and they were talking about the war too, but mostly about having to go back to school early in 1939 in case their school buildings were commandeered by the armed forces. I've been trying to persuade them to write it all down but have had no luck so far.

Date: 26/03/2006 10:30 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] curiouswombat.livejournal.com
I've been trying to persuade them to write it all down but have had no luck so far.

If you can get then talking, write it down yourself - that's why I'm writing down a lot of the oral stuff that's handed down, in case it gets forgotten.

The building I went to secondary school in was built in 1939-40, but was comandeered as a radar operators' school during the war, and only opened to pupils in 1946, according to the school history. Funnily enought I think that exactly the same thing happened to the one that my daughter attends now!

Date: 26/03/2006 10:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ozma914.livejournal.com
Sounds like your mom was a blast! Your husband, on the other hand ... well, men need direct reminders, and even then they forget more than half the time. Hinting won't do, and assuming they'll remember because it's an annual event won't do -- we're just men. That's why I got married on Valentine's Day -- so it would be easy to remember. Needless to say, I don't celebrate Valentine's Day anymore ...

Date: 26/03/2006 10:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] curiouswombat.livejournal.com
I think she was fairly typical of her time - despite war, rationing, the black-out etc the young had fun, as the young always do. I don't think she would ever have been short of dates - she was rather good looking - Marjory wasn't - but was great fun, so I can see them being quite a double act! I have trouble remembering that at the time my Mum was a teenager!

The husband was actually going to bring me a cup of coffee in bed this morning - but he lost track of the time, and so I had to get up anyway or I'd have been late for Church.

I don't hint any more - after all these years I know that hints are just a waste of time and energy!

Date: 26/03/2006 11:18 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ozma914.livejournal.com
Yes, hints are wasted on the male of the species. Still more evidence that females are better.

Isn't it always the case that there's one beauty one one plain person among every group of friends? In addition to one party animal and one shy person? I was the shy, plain one.

Date: 27/03/2006 07:36 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] curiouswombat.livejournal.com
I was the shy, plain one - me too - although if you really were then you're braver on line, or have just matured well!

Date: 27/03/2006 08:36 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ozma914.livejournal.com
I matured well. *And* I'm braver online. :-)

Date: 27/03/2006 12:23 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] missmurchison.livejournal.com
Happy Mother's Day! I'm sorry you didn't get to go out. We don't have our Mother's Day here until May.

Thanks for your stories. I love them, and the bit about the cami-knickers is a hoot.

My mom doesn't have a war story like that, but she was already married. She didn't have a job at one point because she had a two-year-old and was about to give birth again, so she babysat my cousins. Her oven died, and she had to apply to get a new one because of rationing. An inspector came to the house to see if she really needed an oven. She looked about to pop, the place was crawling with children, and my brother and one of his cousins, who looked like twins, were having a toddler fight. The inspector decided she really needed the oven! Of course, she didn't tell him all those kids weren't hers.

Date: 27/03/2006 07:37 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] curiouswombat.livejournal.com
Oh I love it - I can just see that inspector's face! And what a job - 'oven inspector'.

Date: 27/03/2006 01:12 am (UTC)
desdemonaspace: by <lj user="Teragramm"> (Nameless actress)
From: [personal profile] desdemonaspace
I love it when you post bits of your family's history. (I should take a page from your book.) It's funny -- I think of you as my contemporary, and yet my mother is almost old enough to be your Mum's mum.

Yes, she was very pretty, and I see a definite resemblance!

Date: 27/03/2006 07:42 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] curiouswombat.livejournal.com
I'm sure we are contempories - your Mom must have been older when she had you! My Mum is now 79. Actually my niece Elizabeth is the one who looks most like Mum - but I have definitely inherited her nose and her ears - both of which are wondeful, as the nose is simple with no lumps bumps or pointy bits, and the ears sit neatly against the head and don't stick out!

Date: 27/03/2006 11:48 am (UTC)
desdemonaspace: by <lj user="Teragramm"> (Corseted woman)
From: [personal profile] desdemonaspace
Remember, we've seen pics of you, and no visible "bumps or pointy bits"! I got my grandma's nose -- square on the end. *sigh*

Yes, I was a belated child, very -- my mom and dad were born in '15 and '09, respectively.

I forgot to wish you Happy Mother's Day! Hope you were showered with... whatever makes you happiest. Dark rich chocolate? (BTW, thanks for the scone recipe upthread! Saving that as well.)

Date: 27/03/2006 12:05 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] curiouswombat.livejournal.com
I got some dark chocolate coated ginger - bliss!

And some flowers - especially thoughtful of my daughter - as they make her sneeze!

Date: 27/03/2006 04:52 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bojojoti.livejournal.com
I so enjoy reading your bits and pieces. I especially enjoy the cultural differences, but some things are exactly the same. Men are dense, and there is no purpose in hinting. Early in our marriage, my feelings would be hurt if darling spouse forgot an occasion, but I've come to understand that he doesn't mean to. I know he loves me and wants me to be happy, so I give myself a lovely gift and thank him profusely. Works for us!

Date: 27/03/2006 07:45 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] curiouswombat.livejournal.com
You are right about the hinting - ho wouldn't recognise a hint if it was written on a sledge hammer and hit him in the head!

Date: 27/03/2006 01:41 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] spikereader.livejournal.com
I didn't get taken out, but Chris cooked a lovely roast dinner and did all the washing up and clearing away, which was even better than not having to do the cooking.

Lovely wartime stories (they did lose their knickers easily in those days didn't they). My mum is a few years younger than yours, and was at school in London during the war, so missed out on dances with dashing service men.

Date: 27/03/2006 05:25 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] curiouswombat.livejournal.com
Any dinner you don't have to cook, or pot or plate you do not have to wash is a blessing!

they did lose their knickers easily in those days didn't they
As I said, there's a lot to be said for lycra and M&S!

Date: 27/03/2006 02:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] handrejka.livejournal.com
Your mum is only two years older than my dad

Date: 27/03/2006 05:26 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] curiouswombat.livejournal.com
The generations are not really all that clear-cut, when you look at it, are they?

Date: 28/03/2006 01:29 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] cbtreks.livejournal.com
Your mom's photo is lovely - very pretty. It sounds like she was a lot of fun as a teenager!

Date: 28/03/2006 07:46 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] curiouswombat.livejournal.com
She was very pretty wasn't she? I have a feeling that my own teenage years were much less interesting.

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