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curiouswombatFirstly a BIG THANK YOU to everyone who has sent us cards - the place looks very festive.
Also I realise that I have not posted cards to everyone on my card list - so please forgive me if I missed you - I seem to have just missed a whole page in my book...
Today is the first day of my two weeks off work - two whole weeks! Yay!
Last night I put up the last of the decorations - the lights up the stairs.
D-d and I have just put the plain white icing on the Christmas cake - we marzipanned it last night. We are still discussing the final touches of how to decorate it.
She has made lots of Christmas pudding truffles to give her friends as presents, I've done another batch of cookies (orange and cranberry) and some more coconut ice.
I went shopping and actually got parked at M&S - so we now have the turkey in the fridge, and bacon, sausages and so on.
I think I've bought everyone's presents. Just got to wrap them now...
But now I am going to share with you cruel, cruel mockery - excerpts of one of those 'round robin' Christmas missives that I received from a friend from university days. This made my daughter laugh so much she almost fell off her chair - although I don't think it is meant to be funny...
So - this is my ex flatmate from 30+ years ago. This year they decided their 'news letter' (which is not all that exciting at the best of times - you know the type of thing) would be an A-Z.
Except that they were rather scraping the bottom of the barrel for some of the letters.
It starts with A stands for Andy - the husband - we learn that he has been diagnosed as a diabetic and is suffering from arthritis, poor guy - so not a very upbeat beginning.
B is for Berlin, where they had had a family holiday - not too bad.
C is for Christmas - we learn when teenaged son gets home from uni, when daughter and son in law arrive and so on - not terribly fascinating to those of us not invited...
D is for degree - son in law got a 2.1 in Theology. (This made me feel quite within my rights to put a photo of D-d's graduation into my letter I sent them in their card - mentioning that she got a First...)
By G we are at the point where G stands for garden - they mended the bench so that it is safer to sit on.
By K we learn that Sue has mislaid her keys a few times over the year, and Q is for queues - they often have to go to the sorting office to pick up parcels and there is always a queue.
But by this time D-d had laughed so much she was gasping for breath - because I have skipped past the high spot which was, wait for it...
I is for Insoles.
Honestly! Apparently Andy needs insoles or he gets sore feet...
Oh dear.
D-d says I really should send it to Simon Hoggart, the man who writes books about these things.
I wonder why I write them an actual letter every year - D-d says I have to keep doing it so that they keep sending us the printed version...
And yes - it is cruel of me to mock - but sometimes I really can't help myself.
Also I realise that I have not posted cards to everyone on my card list - so please forgive me if I missed you - I seem to have just missed a whole page in my book...
Today is the first day of my two weeks off work - two whole weeks! Yay!
Last night I put up the last of the decorations - the lights up the stairs.
D-d and I have just put the plain white icing on the Christmas cake - we marzipanned it last night. We are still discussing the final touches of how to decorate it.
She has made lots of Christmas pudding truffles to give her friends as presents, I've done another batch of cookies (orange and cranberry) and some more coconut ice.
I went shopping and actually got parked at M&S - so we now have the turkey in the fridge, and bacon, sausages and so on.
I think I've bought everyone's presents. Just got to wrap them now...
But now I am going to share with you cruel, cruel mockery - excerpts of one of those 'round robin' Christmas missives that I received from a friend from university days. This made my daughter laugh so much she almost fell off her chair - although I don't think it is meant to be funny...
So - this is my ex flatmate from 30+ years ago. This year they decided their 'news letter' (which is not all that exciting at the best of times - you know the type of thing) would be an A-Z.
Except that they were rather scraping the bottom of the barrel for some of the letters.
It starts with A stands for Andy - the husband - we learn that he has been diagnosed as a diabetic and is suffering from arthritis, poor guy - so not a very upbeat beginning.
B is for Berlin, where they had had a family holiday - not too bad.
C is for Christmas - we learn when teenaged son gets home from uni, when daughter and son in law arrive and so on - not terribly fascinating to those of us not invited...
D is for degree - son in law got a 2.1 in Theology. (This made me feel quite within my rights to put a photo of D-d's graduation into my letter I sent them in their card - mentioning that she got a First...)
By G we are at the point where G stands for garden - they mended the bench so that it is safer to sit on.
By K we learn that Sue has mislaid her keys a few times over the year, and Q is for queues - they often have to go to the sorting office to pick up parcels and there is always a queue.
But by this time D-d had laughed so much she was gasping for breath - because I have skipped past the high spot which was, wait for it...
I is for Insoles.
Honestly! Apparently Andy needs insoles or he gets sore feet...
Oh dear.
D-d says I really should send it to Simon Hoggart, the man who writes books about these things.
I wonder why I write them an actual letter every year - D-d says I have to keep doing it so that they keep sending us the printed version...
And yes - it is cruel of me to mock - but sometimes I really can't help myself.
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Date: 22/12/2009 09:01 pm (UTC)I don't know why people do those round-robin things, they're always excruciating and, socially, they have exactly the opposite effect to what the senders intend! [My Dad needed insoles, though -- I think it's part of being diabetic (and they are quite interesting, because they're made to measure and you can fit them in any pair of shoes to make them comfortable, LOL).]
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Date: 22/12/2009 09:34 pm (UTC)Andy apparently wears his insoles for his high arches and arthritis... yes - she explained in detail!
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Date: 23/12/2009 12:33 am (UTC)Cheers! I'll be making that on Christmas Eve!
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Date: 22/12/2009 09:01 pm (UTC)hee hee hee
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Date: 22/12/2009 09:37 pm (UTC)Underwear would probably have been warm and sensible...
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Date: 22/12/2009 09:16 pm (UTC)Hope that you have a great holiday - Love and hugs.
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Date: 22/12/2009 09:38 pm (UTC)Seasonal hugs to you too.
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Date: 22/12/2009 09:28 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 22/12/2009 09:40 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 22/12/2009 09:46 pm (UTC)On the other hand, my sister-in-law sends out missives declaring what Worthy Things they have done... and sadly, visiting them in person is a bit the same as reading their Christmas letter. *sigh* Good people, all of them--they do wonderful work with troubled teens--but a bit braggy. And of course because they are doing Worthy Things, you feel guilty in feeling irritated by the way they trumpet it. I never feel I can win, so I mostly smile and nod and say, "How wonderful" through my clenched molars. LOL
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Date: 22/12/2009 10:19 pm (UTC)But I remember saying last year that the people who I have most in common with these days are actually my friends here - you share the interests and small sillinesses that make up everyday life. People that I only communicate with at Christmas wouldn't understand jokes about 'Gondor has no trousers...' or appreciate why my husband, daughter and I had a phone conversation about the homosexual tendencies of the Borg (http://curiouswombat.livejournal.com/184966.html) or whatever. Or those things are too small to remember when we write the annual missive.
And such letters do often become a boast-list like your sister-in-law's, don't they? Full of the worthy things but no mention of parking tickets, or teenagers coming home horribly drunk etc. I suppose at least insoles and queues are less boastful!
Edited so that the link worked...
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Date: 22/12/2009 10:12 pm (UTC)She seems to think I remember all the names of her very extended family, (even those - like her children - that came along long after we stopped actually, you know, meeting face to face) know where their caravan is parked, enjoy hearing about the intimate medical details being shared and always, but always, includes photographs of people I don't have a clue about.
Bizarre...
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Date: 22/12/2009 10:25 pm (UTC)The one you get sounds like one of the latter, too. Yet still them come!
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Date: 22/12/2009 10:17 pm (UTC)Thanks for the funny.
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Date: 22/12/2009 10:31 pm (UTC)Thanks for the funny.
My pleasure! At the moment you only have to say 'insoles' around D-d and she gets the giggles.
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Date: 22/12/2009 10:49 pm (UTC)Words fail me. In our case it would be I is for Inebriated...frequently. I suppose the best thing you can say about that letter is at least it's a talking point!
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Date: 22/12/2009 10:59 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 22/12/2009 11:46 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 23/12/2009 12:01 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 23/12/2009 12:40 am (UTC)Honestly!
The cookies sound great :D
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Date: 23/12/2009 09:17 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 23/12/2009 01:33 am (UTC)I have one friend who always rhymes her letter into a poem, including the good things that have happened along with bad. They are so funny and clever and we look forward to them. The boasting ones I could do without.
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Date: 23/12/2009 09:22 am (UTC)Rhymes would be quite fun.
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Date: 25/12/2009 09:09 pm (UTC)It could have been worse - it might have been
'X is for Extra inches - which Andy has put on (somewhere else) after he responded to an unsolicited e-mail...'
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Date: 23/12/2009 01:37 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 23/12/2009 09:24 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 23/12/2009 05:48 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 23/12/2009 09:25 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 23/12/2009 06:33 am (UTC)Sort of a shame it isn't for insight. Oh, wait a minute...
It is cruel to mock, but there are times when it is unavoidable.
Have a brilliant Christmas!
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Date: 23/12/2009 09:27 am (UTC)Word! As the clever kids say!
Have an excellent Christmas yourself.
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Date: 23/12/2009 09:11 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 23/12/2009 09:31 am (UTC)I would have found photos of your heifers all grown up more interesting and I didn't even know them as calves!
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Date: 23/12/2009 10:23 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 23/12/2009 02:06 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 24/12/2009 10:10 pm (UTC)Your handcrafted item from me is waiting to be finished (ends woven in, button sewn on), but will be on its way soon. Just when the holiday rush is over at the post office, as a matter of fact, and should arrive quickly.
Love the letter. :-)
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Date: 25/12/2009 09:44 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 31/12/2009 08:59 am (UTC)I'm guilty of writing a form letter when I send out Christmas cards (which I didn't get around to last year or this). I used to have such a huge list with all the family that I'd never be able to write personal letters to each and every one, so the form letter was the best I could do. I'm sure there were a number of cringe-worthy letters. The year I had the cat "write" it is probably one.
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Date: 31/12/2009 10:53 am (UTC)Some of the round robins are fun - and some actually tell me about people that I feel I still know and want to be up to date with - but this one was just a step too far to avoid unintended laughter!