Researching for Burns Night, or What Sex is a Computer?

[curiouswombat]

I am doing a speech at the Burns Night Supper this year. I shall be replying to the 'Toast to the lassies'. I've been doing a bit of a read through some of the relevant poetry to get me started, and even looked at a few other people's speeches on line, and some suggestions for humerous bits to use.

During this research I came across the following -

There has been some debate recently as to what gender a computer is, after all if ships are `she' or `her' what sex is the humble computer.
Masculine say women
• In order to get their attention you have to turn them on.
• They have a lot of data but remain clueless.
• They are supposed to help you to solve problems but half the time they are the problem.
• As soon as you commit to one, you realize that if you had waited a little longer you could have had a better model.

Feminine say the men
• No one but their creator understands their internal logic.
• The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else.
• Even your smallest mistakes are stored in long term memory for latter retrieval.
• As soon as you make a commitment to one you find yourself spending half your cheque on accessories for it.

OK - not got much to do with Burns - but it made me giggle.

Comments

[slaymesoftly.livejournal.com]

Hee! I got a good chuckle out of that. :)

[spikesdeb.livejournal.com]

*giggles* That's really tickled me :) And I'm still not sure which is right!

[raingirl26.livejournal.com]

this really tickles me. i hope you find a way to work it into your speach. i always think of Jean Redpath when i think of Burns (Robert, i assume). what a wonderful way to experience his works.

[bojojoti.livejournal.com]

Amusing, but I'm thinking my computer is a conglomerate of both sides.

[mylescorcoran]

Ha! My (all-boy) office enjoyed that one, in both aspects.

[vegmb.livejournal.com]

A very wise woman (former secretary/office manager) once told me that all office equipment are male because you have to play with them every now and then to make them work right...She did this as she was naming our new copy machine Bill.

[cbtreks.livejournal.com]

I've always thought of them as male myself, though I did name my little mp3 player Polyhymnia.